Ah, Ain't Life Grand?
~ By Jan Tincher

Copyright © Jan Tincher - All Rights reserved
http://www.tameyourbrain.com

Hello, everyone! I thought I'd share a personal story with you this week. . .

Man, oh, man, was I really looking forward to it. My husband works at Winnebago Industries where they build motor homes, and they drew his name to use a 36' motor home for a week. We took it to the Winnebago Itasca Rally, which was only 2 miles away -- and many trips, each because I kept remembering things I'd forgotten.

We were there for five days, along with approximately 1000 motor home lovers. But the story starts Saturday, the day before we left.

It was the day I bought a new computer. It was in a big box and I was dragging it at a speedy rate with my head bowed just low enough to run into the very sturdy handlebars of my exercise machine. Ta-da! Baruuuise number one!

Sunday we're packing for this fabulous vacation and I fell down the stairs, rammed my big toe into the step, landed on my elbow, and ta-da! hit my head right above -- are you ready? -- Baruuuise number one! Making them baruuuuises two, three, and four. Are you keeping up?

But did that deter me? Noooooo. I was going on vacation, because I KNEW I was going to have a great time. And I did!

Most of the time.

Tuesday, we discovered we were locked out of the motor home. Thankfully, the windows weren't locked. So, fortunately -- and we'll snicker about that later -- we got one open. Unfortunately, I'm not a very tall person. My hubby, bless his heart, says "I'll boost you up and in. Piece of cake." I was blessing his little heart for a long time.

So, we tried. And we tried. You see the secret to boosting is when his hands go down, you put your foot in them. Then, when they go up, you fly gracefully through the window. Well, I just couldn't get it right. His hands would go up and I would put all my weight down. I would try and spring up and his hands would go down.

Finally, I decided that wasn't working. *I do get these brilliant insights every once in a while.* I took matters into my own hands, or feet as it were, and just jumped, leaving him with nothing to do but push.

Youch! There I was, resembling a curved stick, my feet straight up out the window, and my eyeballs on each side of the chair arm inside the motor home.

It might have been easy to tuck and roll, as they do in the movies, but I had my precious digital camera in the chair which my right eye was eying reluctantly. On the left, well, my left eye was kind of smished closed.

It didn't matter. I already knew what was there. Less than a foot of empty space -- which included a nice sized fall to the floor. I'd already been there, done that, I rationalized, so I kept my feet up, and of course all the cellulite rolled down -- notice I didn't say smoothed out. I couldn't see outside, which was probably good. I'm sure at least half of the 1000 motor home lovers were watching.

I knew I was on my own now, because hubby couldn't really reach me without a giant leap, and, oooh, I shuddered just thinking about it.

Soooo, I ended up having to let my fingers do the walking and soon I was on the floor. I could have curled up in a ball and stayed there, but what the heck? I knew I was going to have to open the door sooner or later.

I unlocked it, opened it in one swell swoop, and took my bow. Only a few clapped, which reinforced the fear that I wasn't as graceful as I'd hoped.

Now, Wednesday was an entirely different story. Winnebago made the motor home that Wheel of Fortune drives all around while looking for potential contestants. I was the only one that got picked of my little group, and I was the only one sitting there, just sure as I could be, that my friends would get picked and I would happily applaud. I really enjoyed it though, and I won a t-shirt and a pen, both items I collect that depict special times in my life. I really had fun.

I had told the Wheel of Fortune announcer that I have a web site, so when he asked me about it, I took a hold of the microphone and told him again, and then said very slowly, "Double-u double-u double-u dot tame your brain dot com."

I had a ball, so the fact that I was smack dab in the hot sun for two full hours, and got a sunburn that was red enough to cover the bruises I got the day before, didn't even register.

But you know what? I'd do it again. I love vacations! And who knows, maybe you'll see me on Wheel of Fortune some day!

But, and there has to be, the moral of this story is: What do you focus on? The fact that you used up almost a whole box of band aids, or the fact that you had a ball -- most of the time?

If you enjoyed this story, pass it on to someone you might know who went to the Winnebago Itasca Rally. See if they remember me. The one with red skin, bruises, and a long, yellow jacket with *double-u double-u double-u dot tame your brain dot com* on it. <grin>