Do You Fear Rejection?
When you make cold calls, do you fear rejection? . . .
When you go for a job interview, do you fear rejection?
When you ask for a favor, a loan, a date, do you fear rejection?
Do you freeze up with this fear?
Ah. Well, maybe you wouldn’t if you knew what this fear is costing you. Let’s see if it’s worth it.
What is this ‘fear’ costing you financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally?
It’s easy! Just look into the future to see what this fear will cost you.
How will it feel five years from now, if you let this fear grow? (And, believe me, if you don’t do something about it, it WILL grow.)
Five years down the road, think about it and just imagine how much this fear will cost you financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally?
TIP: It has to have gotten worse, because nothing stays the same. It keeps going in the direction you are now headed unless you do something about it.
See how bad it can get. Project the worst into the future. If you project the worst, you are showing your brain ‘agony’. Your brain doesn’t like agony any better than you do, and it isn’t going to want to go down that road. It will do all it can to keep you from it, If you really make it distasteful.
Now repeat the process, only make it worse, as you go ten years down the road. How will it feel ten years from now? What is it costing you financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally?
TIP: Are you making it really bad? If not, go back and really make it bad.
How will it feel fifteen years from now? What will it cost you financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally? Fifteen years from now! YIKES, it’s terrible!
How will it feel twenty years from now? What will it cost you financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally? Twenty years from now! Give me a break! I can’t take it!
Great. You are really miserable, huh? OK. Shake that off. Stand up and move around. Now, sit down — only in a different chair.
Now, think for a moment. 20 years hasn’t happened yet. Hey, does that mean YOU can change the future? Yes, you can.
What you need to change the future is a new belief, a new set of rules, about what must happen before you feel rejected.
You’ve made it easy to feel rejected up to now. What would a new set of beliefs do for you? How about this? How about if your new beliefs make it really tough to feel rejected?
Maybe the only way you can feel rejected is if the person whom you think is rejecting you is over seven feet tall, talks with a Pig Latin accent, and has a neon pink mustache?
How would that feel if you made new rules that said the only way you can feel rejected from now on means the ‘rejecter’ has to be over seven feet tall, talk with a Pig Latin accent, and have a neon pink mustache? You couldn’t feel rejected unless these rules are followed 100%.
It also wouldn’t hurt to realize that no matter what someone says or does, they’re not rejecting you. Maybe they’ve had a bad day, and they’re rejecting your idea or they’re rejecting their impression of you at that moment. If you realize that THIS IS NOT PERMANENT, you can easily get on with your life. Nothing in this world is really permanent. Go with the flow. This too shall pass.
Now, assuming you have actually decided the only way you can feel rejected is if the ‘rejecter’ is over seven feet tall, talks with a Pig Latin accent, and has a neon pink mustache, what is this new belief doing for you financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally?
Let’s see that smile on your face. It’s working, isn’t it? Your new belief is working FOR you. And if it isn’t, keep thinking until you find one that IS!
That being so, how will it feel five years from now? How are you feeling financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally? Look at that grin!
How will it feel ten years from now financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally? Look at that huge smile! You are happy with your life, and no one is letting you down by rejecting you because you set the rules!
How will you be feeling fifteen years from now financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally? Looking better? You bet ‘cha!
How will it feel twenty years from now financially? Mentally? Spiritually? Physically? Socially? Emotionally? Man, there is one smooth person! Who’s in charge here? YOU ARE!
You are ready to roll, but first maybe you should get rid of all your past rejections so you can face the future. Make a picture in your mind of your last five rejections. As you think about them, run a movie where they all in it, all five times, one right after the other.
Now, run the movie backwards in brilliant color.
Now, run it forwards with everyone twice as large as they are.
Now, backwards with circus music running through it and everyone’s tongues hanging out and their ears flapping.
One thing to remember, here, is that it’s important to know we aren’t making fun of anyone. We are taking control of our responses to the situation.
Now, stand straight and tall, and feel success. Again. Again. Again.
Now, imagine someone rejecting you. Stand straight and tall and feel success.
Repeat six times: Imagine someone rejecting you. Stand straight and tall and feel success.
Feel how good that feels? Again, who’s in charge? YOU! Doesn’t that feel terrific?
If you like this technique, pass it on to a friend. Watch as their life changes for the better.
Remember, if you take the time and effort to change your view of reality, your brain will put in the time and effort to make your reality become your view.
Thanks for reading.
Master Neuro Linguistic Programmer
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DISCLAIMER: Jan Tincher and/or *Tame Your Brain!* do not guarantee or warrant that the techniques and strategies portrayed will work for everyone. The techniques and strategies are general in nature and may not apply to everyone. The techniques and strategies are not intended to substitute for obtaining medical advice from the medical profession. Always consult your own professionals before making any life-changing decisions.
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